THIS GROWING LOVE
As soon as I hit the twelve week mark, my nausea started to wear off. By the end of May, my body felt like mine again and all the discomfort had miraculously disappeared.
Sure, there was this growing belly and my thighs, breasts and buttocks became rounder by the day. I actually started showing very early on and throughout the first two trimesters my belly was going to be on the larger side. However I absolutely loved these changes and every inch of my body who did such an amazing job at providing and nurturing our little boy.
By week twelve I had already told everyone about the pregnancy, including my job, due to either coincidence or decision. Anyways there was no hiding my discomfort during the first trimester and I felt more relief communicating my situation than keeping it to myself.
Which meant that as I was now entering this second phase of pregnancy, all I had to do was to relax and enjoy. June was really a perfect time for this. With summer around the corner and my body almost back to its pre-pregnancy levels of activity I started to practice yoga again, went for a swim or dip almost every other day and took up classes like pregnancy yoga and aqua workout. I continued to teach my full schedule, minimising the demonstration part in my classes and instead focusing on giving even clearer cues and assists to my students. As I usually bicycle to my classes, I spend an average 40 minuets per day moving which felt great in my body and mind. As for food, I had come back to my usual eating habits, with no cravings or irregularities whatsoever.
Also, this was the time of the ultrasounds getting more and more exciting as we would see our little boy grow. Yaron didn’t miss one appointment and I love that we got to share this experience. By mid June our little babies` body and head looked entirely human and had lost all its embryo resemblance. To see him, to witness his movements and heartbeat made our connection even stronger. Shortly before going on my summer vacation, we got to see him in a 4D ultrasound and already found a resemblance to Yaron in his features.
In our relationship little rituals had started to grow that deepened the bond between the three of us. There were times of simply touching and caressing my belly, times of speaking to the baby, often as if he already lived with us outside of the womb, times of playing music to him by placing headphones on my belly. These moments during the day were precious and always left me feel nurtured and taken care of, with a deep sense of gratitude. I had started a little journal where I wrote entries on my experiences and feelings and attached the ultrasound pictures. When alone, I loved to sing songs and dance and especially chanting mantras always stirred something and made our little boy move and respond.
I also loved how everyone became so sweet and attentive the moment I started to show. Complete strangers would offer nice words, I would never stay without a seat in the subway and generally everybody would be careful and polite around me. The respect and sense of protection this unborn life brought out in the people around me was a beautiful and unexpected experience.
In my family there is this tradition of going on summer vacations together, even now that most of us siblings are grown up. I pondered whether I should hold on to this ritual one last time and finally decided that yes, I was going on one last family summer vacation before dedicating most of my time to our own little tribe. So by the end of July I left to Southern Spain, where I was going to spend a few weeks with my parents and four siblings. Even though I missed Yaron and felt more vulnerable than usual it was a beautiful time. I will always remember those weeks as a gift to myself and my family, wo got to share the first hand experience of me being pregnant and our little son growing inside of my belly. By the end of the holiday everybody had felt the little guy move and grown a deeper connection. My mum proved to be super intuitive and always felt exactly what we needed, without ever imposing. These were sweet days of slow mornings, outdoor yoga practice, daily swims in the ocean, small hikes, playing games or simply dozing off in the middle of the day. The perfect way to end my second trimester.